I can’t fucking handle this. I knew he was getting skinny again, but I didn’t think he was going to die. I don’t fucking know what to do.

James and Russell are sneezing constantly, and one of James’s eyes has gotten all small and sort of cloudy and I don’t know what happened but I’m freaking out because there are no good vets in this area who treat rats and I don’t have any money anyway. And I was going to ask my parents for money to go see a friend this weekend, but that’s obviously out the window if I have to take the rats to a vet. Though I have no clue what vet I’ll take them too.

Why can’t I keep weight on this poor rat? He was finally starting to get bigger, but now he’s skin and bones again. I can feel all the bumps in his spine, and I just can’t figure out why he keeps losing weight!

I’m going to start giving him ensure and some baby food again. His cagemates are two times his size, even though they’re a few months younger. My poor baby. :(

I gave the rats some nuts in the shell, then sat and watched their attempts to get to the actual food inside.

James was the smart one and went for the almond that was already half open. Cas grabbed a hazelnut, which is my favourite, but is almost completely round, and therefore really damn hard to open. Russell grabbed a walnut.

After a few minutes, Russell got bored of his walnut, and stole Cas’s hazelnut. But he gave up on that pretty quickly. So then he took the half eaten almond James had abandoned in favour of another almond. 

They all stuck to the almonds until they were gone, and then considered the walnuts, before giving it all up as a lot cause.

I’m honestly surprised they figured the whole thing out this fast! It took them forever to figure out that the chunks of frozen veggies floating in a bowl of water were edible, and even longer to figure out how to actually get them out.

I’m really nervous about moving with the rats. I don’t know why, but I just feel like there’s something about my parents’ house that causes rats to die, and I just wouldn’t be able to handle that.

I’ve just had really bad luck with rats for a long time when I lived at my parents’ and I’m still constantly afraid for the rats I have now.

Cas still has trouble keeping on weight. At this point I’m not sure if he’s just destined to be a skinny rat, or if there’s something more I should be doing. But considering both his brothers became extremely thin before they suddenly died, I’m terrified that the same will happen to Cas.

I don’t worry much about Russell and James, because they’ve both always been pretty healthy, but they just don’t have the same loving personality Cas has. I would be really upset if I lost them, but it still somehow isn’t the same.

I had the boys out for some free roam time on my bed. James and Cas were near my feet, and one of them had a hold of my toe, which I don’t usually allow, because as most rat owners know, rats have a strange fondness for nibbling feet. But before I could shoo them away, one of them surprised whichever was holding my toe (I wasn’t looking) and he bit me. It didn’t break the skin or even leave a mark, but it did hurt. I’m pretty sure James was the one who surprised Cas, meaning Cas probably was the one who bit my toe. I’m not mad at him, because he’s not at all a biter and I knw he didn’t mean to. I am a little annoyed at James for being a bully though.

James’ new thing is apparently grooming Cas’ mouth, which Cas doesn’t seem too thrilled about.

I’m hoping to work more on turning James and Russell into social boys. James is much more receptive to being held and petted, but Russell isn’t very fond of either, but he has improved since I first got him. They both used to squeal like crazy any time you tried to pick them up.

I asked the director of Rat Chick, Stacy if she thought Barnaby (the hairless boy I mentioned before) would be a good match for me, but she hasn’t gotten back to me. Usually I rename prenamed rats that I get, but Barnaby seems like a fitting name for him, so I think I’ll keep it if he ends up with me.

Thanks to the advice of http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/ who suggested that I feed the rats a little bit three times daily, the fighting has almost completely stopped. Sam and Cas are both gaining much-needed weight and everyone seems happier and calmer. There’s been lots of grooming and playful tussles, which I never saw before. I’m so happy.

Hopefully I’ll be able to post pictures of the  boys soon. Since my camera broke, it’s been really hard. Not to mention, the boys never stay still for long.

True to the form of the man he is named after, Dean is trying like hell to make off with one of my vodka-spiked gummy bears. Cas had absolutely no interest in them, even when I offered him one to see what he would do.

I just got back from five days away from home, and one of the first things I did was check on my mischief. Everyone seems to have gotten bigger while I was away, especially Sammy, who is getting pretty huge.

Sam and Castiel’s lumps seem to have shrunken, and I think Dean has regained a bit of the weight he lost. (I have yet to weigh him.)

On the negative side of things,Dean has three wounds on his back that have gotten pussy. I put some neosporin on them, but I’m worried. If he is getting bullied, these wounds might not have a chance to heal properly, and infection looks like it might be a problem as well.

I’m going to keep a close eye on everyone and hope for the best.